The Zionist Games

In about three hours, the Olympic torch will pass my office. Or should I say the Zionist torch?

According to Iranian officials, the London 2012 clearly demonstrates Zionist control of the Olympic Games, since the numbers in the much-maligned logo design—a jagged and misshapen representation of the year 2012—can be rearranged to kind of resemble the spelling of “ZION.”

'As Internet documents have proved, using the word Zion in the logo of the 2012 Olympic Games is a disgracing action and against the Olympics' valuable mottos,' read a letter from Iran’s Olympic Committee to the head of the International Olympic Committee. 'There is no doubt that negligence of the issue from your side may affect the presence of some countries in the Games, especially Iran which abides by commitment to the values and principles.'

Conspiracy theorists and other anti-Semitic antagonists were inspired by this Iranian 'revelation,' and YouTube was inundated with animations and videos claiming that a Zionist-controlled New World Order was using the London games as another step in its plan for world domination. They failed to explain how such crafty Zionists could be so foolish as to tip their hand by identifying themselves in so public a manner and also why those same Zionists couldn'd force the Olympics Committee to observe a minute's silence for the eleven Israeli athletes killed in cold blood at the 1972 Munich Games.

The ultimate proof of truth of the theory, though, is that if the logo is not changed, Iran will boycott the Games. Israel knew that all along. And with Iran out of the Games, Israel's poodle America will at last be able to take home some gold medals!